And you also find out interesting things when you have sons, like...
1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house
4 inches deep.
2! ..) If you sp ray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with
roller blades, they can ignite.
3.) A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults i n a crowded
restaurant.
4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong
enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman
cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread
paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.
5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When
using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times
before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit
by a ceiling fan.
7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words 'uh oh', it's already
too late.
8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
9.) A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a
36- year old Man says they can only do it in the movies.
10.) Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year
old Boy.
11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.
12.) Super glue is forever.
13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still
can't walk on water.
14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
15.) VCR's do not eject 'PB & J' sandwiches even though TV commercials
show they do.
16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.
19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not
like ovens.
20.) The fire department in Austin ! , TX has a 5-minute response time.
21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms
dizzy.
22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.
23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
24.) 80% of Women will pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without kids.
25.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox
Only in America ......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of
the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes
at the front.
Only in America ......do people order
double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
Only in America ......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens
to
the counters.
Only in America ......do we leave cars
worth thousands of dollars in the
driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
Only in America ......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in
packages of eight.
Only in America ......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process
so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking
creatures'.
Only in America ......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille
lettering.
EVER WONDER ....
Why the sun lightens our hair,
but darkens our skin
?
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?
Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?
Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made
with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
Why didn't Noah swat those two
mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for
lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't
they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
< BR>
Why are they called apartments when
they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of
progress?
If flying is so safe,
why do they call the airport the terminal?
I just added the following, being the Mom of a very intelligent inquisitive
7-year old boy, and having Dean in the mix....
Why boys need parents:
